Ho hum....

Awake when I don't need to be, sleepy when I need to be awake.
Motivated for the wrong things at the wrong time.

Miraculous that I've made it this far. =P

Windows 7, by the way, is outstanding.  Even on an old desktop PC it's just smoother and faster.

I've decided to move to a different room to get my own space.  I'll miss the company, but I think I may get some divine Company, and this may aid me more in my day-to-day existence.


We sang a new song at church today.  It happened to be an old hymn, with rewritten music and a chorus added.  It's strange how I always thought worship music writing was an enterprise I felt too presumptuous to take upon myself, but circumstance has caused to be something I've done regularly in the past year.

What is it that makes two people right for each other?  And how can you know if people are truly happy or not?  The eyes deceive, and only God can really see it.  I find that my observations and guesses are often far off, and my criticisms at times are simply devoid of trust in Providential purpose.

Walking through life unconsciously... going from one moment to the next... I see myself doing this...I see others doing it.  And I wonder as to the purpose.  Not in the sense that I don't think I have at least partly understood it, but I find the impulse to wonder happens nonetheless.

When I hear about happiness and excitement of others, I feel a sad, sometimes sardonic emotion... other times I am glad, but still in a slightly sad way.  Why always tainted by melancholy?  Because I know what they feel will not last forever.  Inevitably something will come in the next moment and spoil it, even if that spoiling is for their ultimate good. 


I've learned that sitting in utter silence, without internal or external noise, is a necessity.

I've accepted that loneliness is a fruitful way of refining the soul.

Finally, I realized this week that the absence of something you took for granted exposes at least in part its true value to you.